Tough Love

Thursday, September 01, 2005

Even More Slang!

Here are the latest terms making us titter into our vodka and Horlicks over in Tough Love Towers

H&M – No, not the purveyor of cheap tight t-shirts beloved by The Gays. A H&M is a (H)igh (M)aintenance homosexual. You know the type. You go on two dates with them and they’re wedding ring shopping in their lunch hour at Elizabeth Duke. And God forbid you should forget to reply to a text message instantly.

JIN – This isn’t a misspelling of Mother (Mary’s) ruin, gin either. Nor does it refer to an exotic fire spirit of Arabic pre-Islamic mythology. It’s actually a cunning anagram used to describe the pulling criteria of indie-pulling gays like ourselves.

You see, there is such a thing as TOO indie. This, again, is easy to spot. TOO indie types spend a little bit too much of their time thinking about Sleater Kinney B-sides for their own good. They can also look a bit – well – extreme and/or have disappointing stomachs or self-mutilation issues.

Like Goldilocks snaffling the Three Bears’ (snigger) porridge, you need to find a balance. Hence JIN, which stands for

(J)ust
(I)ndie
e(N)ough

Dougie McFly is, for example, just indie enough, despite really being a pop kid. Yum.

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Right, time to crawl back under that stone where we belong…